Smokin' Hot

I know I missed another day. Turns out that toothache was much worse than I thought. Now I'm on antibiotics which never really agree with me. Anyway... it's time for a movie review! One of my favourite movies because I need to think happy thoughts. You know how in my review of Clue I said that it's hard to have alot of main characters without one person stealing the show or getting confusing? Clue did it well, but there is another movie that I think managed it even better.

That movie of course is 200 Cigarettes. Ah, what a fantastic film. You know it's good when Casey Afleck is in it, and I can pretend for an hour and a half that he's a good actor. Seriously. Have you ever seen Lonesome Jim? He makes me want to smash my head against the table. Yet, even he does a great job as the punk with a heart of gold. However, his storylines aren't the best in my humble opinion. (Which is what you're reading, so get used to it being shoved down your throat.)


(picture copyright Dogstar Films)

[SPOILERS AHEAD] Lucy (Courtney Love) and Kevin (Paul Rudd) provide the perfect angsty love story. They're really close friends who are afraid to admit they have feelings for each other. Just as they're about to get together, Kevin's ex-girlfriend Ellie (Janeane Garofalo) comes back into the picture. Don't fret folks. They do get together in the end. It's heart warming.

Though, the best part of the movie is Elvis Costello. No, I just don't mean that the movie has a killer soundtrack. [SPOILERS AHEAD] I mean the fact that he plays himself, and he actually goes to Monica's (Martha Plimpton) party. You know, right after she passes out drunk thinking no one is coming. God, every time I watch this movie, I feel really sorry for her. Yet, I can't help laughing. Alot.

It's just a fun movie with great humour, great music and a seriously great cast. You know, with Casey Afleck aside. (Yes, I do hate him that much.) The title unfortunately has nothing to do with them smoking 200 cigarettes throughout the film. Lucy buys Kevin a carton of cigarettes for his birthday which, of course, is 200 cigarettes. I wish the myth that they smoked that much was true. I lost count after about 60 cigarettes. Maybe you can watch it and count yourself.

Creepy Masks, Creepy Fun

I have a toothache, and it is driving me crazy. I can't really think straight. It was bad enough sitting still through a whole movie, but I was literally riveted to the spot for the first time in awhile that I kind of forgot that my tooth was in extreme pain.

The movie I was watching was Carriers (finally). I have been dying to see this movie since I saw the ad where the main characters are wearing those creepy masks. Man, that alone scared me.


(picture copyright Paramount Vantage)

The movie is not a horror film. I guess you could make a strech and call it thriller, but then again, I never was good at genres. I call everything I listen to "alternative". It did make me jump a few times, but this movie isn't out to scare you. It isn't out to warn you. I don't even think you could really call it a study of how people would act in this type of situation.

Carriers mainly is just a story. This is what happens to these four people who are forced together during this epidemic and how they cope with the world around them. Simple. I like it. [SPOILERS AHEAD] I sat here and read the boards where people are complaining that it was left open ended. That the virius is never explained or even named. Can't people just sit and enjoy a movie for what it is without a backstory? In real life, you don't always know how something started.

Okay, maybe I just liked it because I'm a huge Lou Taylor Pucci fan (as you know). I'm just glad that he was in a movie that is getting alot of attention. It's about time he's recognized. The film was decent enough. I'm not saying that it's my favourite film now. As I said in my post about Legion, I'm not huge on "end of the world" type films anyway. Usually it is due to the self rightous message. "Oh, you looted this store to survive. Now you must die because that's wrong." Spare me.

Then again, it might just be the masks. A smiley face with a tongue sticking out? Vampire teeth? They're just so damn cheerful... It's creepy. It does fit in with the ultimate rule in Zombieland: Enjoy the little things. If the world was ending, I'd be cracking jokes to keep from going crazy. I'm still sure I'm having nightmares with cheery face masks tonight, though.

Short and to the Point

I've been missing another two days, I know. I had much bigger fish to fry (a.k.a. geeking out over the season 5 Criminal Minds finale). I'll be honest, I didn't even have any idea of what to blog about those two days anyway. I used the excuse of being busy, but I wouldn't have known what to write if I had sat down at the computer anyway.

So I was thinking about it today. I ended up watching some of the songs from Dr. Horrible's Sing Along Blog earlier. I pretty much consider that a short film despite being orginally released in three parts online. It was eventually released on DVD (which I, of course, own). It did help me think of a topic for today.

There are not enough short films out there anymore. Well, okay. Let me rephrase that. There are probably hundreds of short films made in the United States alone, but they are barely advertised. Back when I actually watched the Academy Awards, I always hated when they gave out the award for Best Short Film. I had never even heard of any of the nominees. I'd be like "Who cares?"

And it's really sad because no one really cares. Recently, I've gotten into short films again thanks to LOGO. They have a great program where they show short films make by gay directors. Not all of them are fantastic, but it's nice to know that someone out there is willing to give these films a shot at some recognition. You would think that with the instant availability due to the Internet that an exact opposite would be happening and short films would be becoming more popular.

Unfortunately, unless you count the few successes such as Dr. Horrible, short films are losing. I have decided now that I'm going to do more on my part to find short films instead of waiting for them to come to me. Maybe then if I ever decide to actually watch the awards again, I'll know what they're talking about. It is always nice to have an opinion.

Singin' a Tune

I have a soft spot for musicals. I love them. The classics, the bizarre, the independents... There is just something so whimsical about them, even if they deal with more serious subject matter (see Sweeny Todd). This entry is going to be a bit different than all previous ones.

Why? Well, I just want to briefly talk about a dream of mine. A dream where one day we will live in a world where you can break out in song or dance (or both) and everyone will join in. They'll already know the lyrics and the moves. It will be glorious.

The only thing I need to do to make this dream a reality is find out how random passerbys suddenly know exactly what I'm going to sing about. They have to know the tempo of the song. Oh, and they definitely have to be able to harmonize with me. How do the people in musicals do it? I guess in this alternate realities, everyone can telepathically communicate.

That has to be the answer. There is just no other way about it. So, now that is my goal in life. Find a way to make it so that people can communicate telepathically. Oh, and also be as good at making up lyrics on the spot as Wayne Brady. Because I'm not going to write all these songs off the top of my head when I'm walking around town.

The Best For Last

DVDs have allowed us rot our brains even more with hours of extra footage, and do I love every minute of that brain cell killing footage. Sure, I watch the extra features sometimes. Horror movies are the best for how they do the make up. So I have a bit of an obsession with fake blood? So what?

Though, I hate when I look into the special features and see "Alternative Ending". Why? Because it always seems that I actually end up liking that ending better than the one the director went with. (Usually to aquire a paticular rating.) I have already sort of dealt with this in my review of Disturbing Behavior when I said that a line in the alternative ending should have been left in the film. It fit the sarcastic overtone of the rest of the movie.

Today, I was watching Night of the Living Dorks with my dad again. I remembered that the first time I watched it, I did end up looking at the features, including the other ending. [SPOILERS AHEAD] Throughout the whole movie, they talk about the upcoming summer dance, but we never see that. In the other possible ending, there is a huge confrontation between characters at said dance. It's a bit more dramatic than the ending that eventually was used in the film.

Not that I dislike the ending. I think it's pretty good, but when you have an over the top movie that already clearly has an R rating, why else would you cut out an ending that fits better? Especially when it is blatently obvious that in this example, the "alternative" one was actually the original. Why else would we spend time discussing the dumb summer dance, then?

So now, if I end up watching the special features on a DVD, I don't watch alternative endings. Deleted scences are fair game, though sometimes I end up yelling at my television because of those too. I understand that alot of ideas are going to end up being cut out so impatient people like me don't have to sit through a four hour movie. I just wish that the best ending was the first choice, not the last.

Side Show Steals Show

When I first read about The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus, it was before Heath Ledger's untimely death. I was overly excited to see it because I was (and am) not only a huge fan of Ledgers, but also of Terry Gilliam and fantasy movies. It is hard to find good fantasy these days. The last good one I saw was another Gilliam effort starring Ledger (The Brothers Grimm), but Imaginarium was just what I needed.

If you did not know, Ledger passed away during the filming of the movie. Soon, the film was getting more press than it probably would have. Everyone was waiting with baited breath to see what would happen with the last footage starring Ledger would bring. I was apprehensive how the movie would turn out since everything I read made it seem like there hadn't been much shot. Then Gilliam brought in three other actors (Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell) to finish Ledger's role. I was afraid it would going to turn into Plan 9 From Outer Space.

However, Gilliam managed to pull it off. Imaginarium was not absolutely brillant, but it delivered. [SPOILERS AHEAD] Doctor Parnassus (Christopher Plummer) has the ability to let people into his mind or the imaginarium where their wildest dreams come true. This allowed the last Tony (Ledger's character) scenes to be easily played by other actors. Three different people's worlds have different versions of Tony's and it works perfectly.

[SPOILERS AHEAD] Unfortunately, I felt that the ending would have been different if not for this unfortunate turn of events. Tony probably would have been redeemed, but instead he ends up continuing with his old ways and is killed by an angry mob when they discover he stole money from his charity. The ending ends up being bittersweet since Valentina (Lily Cole) and Anton (Andrew Garfield) end up together and away from the crazy world of the doctor.

You really have to use your imagination to watch this film. It doesn't take much to be taken away in Gilliam's world and you totally buy that all these men are Tony. It was a devestation that Ledger passed away because he was a talented actor, and I know that he would have went on to make many more brillant films. R.I.P. Heath Ledger

Speechless

Yeah, I didn't know what to even title this entry. I watched Gigantic today, and the movie left me completely speechless. I felt completely cheated by what could have been a fantastic film that instead became what I saw as a combination of two movies that had no business being together.

I should have listened to Lou when she said it wasn't worth my time. I've been watching alot of movies recently that are a waste of good talent. I honestly love Paul Dano. He was fantastic in Little Miss Sunshine. You have to be to convey so much emotion without talking for more than half the film. Then, his role in Explicit Ills was so heartbreaking. He made that movie for me.

[SPOILERS AHEAD] Then he goes and plays Bryan who I'm not sure if he's either shy or out going. Then he starts seeing a homeless man (Zach Galifianakis - Yeah I was surprised too.) who is constantly beating him up. Other characters acknowledge his injuries, but then near the end of the film Bryan "kills" the homeless man, and then the body is no longer there. Is Bryan skitzophrenic? How in God's name did he pass the inspections to adopt a child?

This was the only plotline that ended up going nowhere either. [MORE SPOILERS AHEAD Happy (Zooey Deschanel) sort of screws things up with Bryan. She gets sick when he tells her he was approved to adopt a baby. She skips his party and while they're talking about that, she doesn't drink. She goes to his apartment to apologize and starts to say "I'm..." when she is rudely interrupted by his family. Okay, I kind of figured out for myself that she was probably pregnant, but then they just end the film with that. C'mon! I want to know: does she keep the baby? Abort? Do they stay together?

Even the saving graces of this film John Goodman and Edward Asner (the fathers of our two barely developed characters) couldn't save the film. They provided some laughs, but in the end were portrayed as nothing but politically incorrect old men. Seriously? Oh, and what's up with the title? What is gigantic? The disappointment at the end of the film?

I should start writing these films. Here's how I see this movie playing out. Keep the first half as is. That was alright. Bryan ends up knocking up Happy, and she breaks the news to him. He pulls off the adoption list and they raise their baby together. Sure, it's too neat and simple. Real life doesn't work out this way. But at least it makes sense.

We Are the Weirdos

While I was growing up, it was kind of hard to find strong female characters to look up to. Don't get me wrong. Who doesn't love getting saved? I just really wanted some girls who could kick ass once in awhile. When I was 12, I saw The Craft for the first time, and I became obsessed with it.

Granted, these girls are not exactly someone you should be looking up to. Even the main character Sarah (Robin Tunney) doesn't exactly play nice. It was just refreshing to finally find a movie where the girls were in charge. Plus, the wardrobes were fantastic.

Pretty much the movie is just about these four young witches who have to deal with the consequences of their powers. Sarah seems to be the only one who realizes that they cannot abuse magic while the others use spells to get back at people they don't like, gain money, etc.

Even though we have the one responsible witch, she still isn't exactly a princess. Though the movie ends with her helping her dad with the groceries, it always seemed to me that now Sarah seems to be abusing magic. Then again, I could have read that wrong. Enough about Sarah, though, seriously. She always annoyed me. Let's talk about Nancy (Fairuza Balk).

I loved Nancy. Man, she was so badass. [SPOILERS AHEAD] She starts off living in a trailor with her over worked mother and her deadbeat boyfriend. As her powers grow, she manages to kill the schlub and turns out... he had a pretty big insurance policy. Kaching! Okay, so maybe she gets a little power crazy, but I truly feel sorry for her in the end. [STILL MORE SPOILERS] Sure she tried to kill Sarah, but did she deserve to be put in a mental institution? I guess this is where my love for the anti-hero started. I knew I was supposed to feel more for Sarah, but boo hoo. She was all "Feel sorry for me." while Nancy took what she wanted. Plus, she had friggin' boss boots.

As with most movies I love, The Craft isn't a masterpiece. There are alot of shots where you can see crew members. Oh, and you can tell Tunney is wearing a wig since she shaved her head for Empire Records. (I love her in that role. Still not a good female hero, however.) But it was my first exposure to kickass girls. For that, I am grateful.

Three Days Well Spent

I know! I didn't get to post yesterday. I made a promise to myself I wasn't going to be totally obsessive about posting every day, and I managed to not freak out having missed a day. (Okay, I totally did freak out.) I was a bit busy because I was hanging out with Coco and Arden. We ended up watching The Wasp Woman, and it occured to me that I've had a movie blog for a month now and I haven't written about Rober Corman yet.

Where to begin with Roger Corman. Well, he's got to have the longest IMDb page I have ever seen. To being with, he has 389 producer credits. Although he has sworn off making movies, he is still producing movies to this day, the most recent one being Sharktopus which is to air this summer. (Now I totally want to see this.)

My first Corman film, as is most people's, was Little Shop of Horrors. Corman didn't do too many horror/comedies during his career (most of his were either exploitation or scifi) but my two favourite movies of his were in this genre. I feel that he set the stage for later directors to really fine tune this vein of movies.

The first of those two films is Little Shop. I mean, it's a classic. A classic made in three days using a set that was made for another movie. I love it. Corman always was finding ways to save money. Sometimes it wasn't such a good idea, but LSOH managed to become a cult classic (using my definition of the term, of course) and is still a fantastic film to this day.

The other one is a movie that isn't as well known called Bucket of Blood. Once again, Corman is his best whilst thinking on his feet. This was another film made in less than a week using sets and props from previous films. I believe the script was written in about one day with only few rewrites. (My source being How I Made 100 Movies in Hollywood and Never Lost a Dime by Corman.)

Once again, another director that has this DIY ethic that I feel has been lost on the current genration. I said my faith was restored in modern day movies thanks to alot of fantastic children's films that are coming out. I think it's if more directors were as dedicated and that aren't just focused on getting big name talent and big time graphics, we would see more outstanding films.

God Save Me

I was actually quite excited to see Legion. I'm not usually one for end of the world type movies (unless the end of the world is coming due to zombies) but the trailer had me convinced it would be at least a decent film. I mean, they got Paul Bettany who I love. C'mon! Chaucer from A Knight's Tale? He was brillant. Oh, and you can't forget Dennis Quaid who is the man.

Unfortunately, I was incrediably disappointed with this film. It just fell flat on all accounts. The beginning was promising for a bit. [KIND OF SPOILERS AHEAD] Especially when Gladys (Jeanette Miller), the little old lady from the ad, starts cursing and climbing on the ceiling. It was pretty cool.

But for a movie that was supposed to be action packed, it was pretty talky. Sure, I perfer movies that focus on the characters' interactions with each other (see Thumbsucker) but I sat down for my annual action packed blockbuster. Instead, I was given entire passages of the characters spouting monologues about how terrible their life is. Oh, suck it up. You're all in the same boat now. You've made it this far through the apocolypse. Obviously you did something right.

I was also ticked off that the entire mythology was never really explained. Okay, we get it Michael (Bettany). The baby needs to be born to save humankind. You said it twenty thousand times. Now, could you please go into a bit more detail. It'll only take a minute, honest. Why this child? He was conceived out of wedlock. Is it him because that's like a big F.U. to God? Because then it could be pretty much any baby. I actually want to know, but instead, we had to spend 20 minutes on Sandra (Kate Walsh) mourning the loss of her husband (Jon Tenney).

To be quite blunt, there is no point to see this movie. Catholic or atheist, it's going to offend you just by sheer lack of plot. It was a waste of some great talent and potentially good scenes.

Spoiler Alert

Since I started this blog a month ago, I made a promise to make sure I alerted you to any possible spoilers. I usually have trouble keeping my mouth shut when I'm talking about movies in real life. More than once, I've accidently given away the ending of a movie to someone who hasn't seen it before.

I often have to reread my entries before posting them to make sure I haven't said something that would ruin the movie for anyone who would like to watch that movie after seeing a review I posted. Usually the only things I fix in my posts is adding [SPOILERS AHEAD].

Sure, I hate when people ruin movies for me too, but I don't get as bent out of shape as some people. I could be told something revealing in the main plotline of a movie before viewing it, and I'll still be able to enjoy it when I do get around to watching it.

I have to say, it is worse when the whole ending is known before hand. This, while my example is not exactly a spoiler, is what has caused me to never watch The Crow in full to this day. I was sleeping while some friends were watching it and woke up just in time for the end. Sometimes I wonder if it's worth watching a movie if you already know how it's going to end.

If that movie is fantastic, of course it's worth watching even if you know what is going to happen. I have to work on that feeling that it's pointless then. I know that The Crow is supposed to be a great movie. I'll get around to it eventually, but I keep putting movies that I don't know the endings too before it.

So, I give you the curtesy of adding [SPOILERS AHEAD] so that I don't ruin any of these movies for you. I know that when I rave about a movie, I'd be mad if that movie had been ruined for me by some moron blogging about them.

I Found a Clue

Today Arden, Devon and I played a lovely little game of Clue. Devon ended up winning. (Professor Plum in the lounge with the knife.) I was very close to winning, mind you, but whenever I play, it got me thinking "When I get home... I know what I'm going to write about today."

Clue is possibly is one of my favourite movies of all time. Who cannot love a comedy/mystery based on a classic board game? Okay, so it sounds ridiculous when you first think about it, but trust me. It's a fantastic movie.

I have to say this first off because I truly believe that what makes this movie is the cast. Since there are six characters in the game, they all had to be present in the movie. Then there were three other characters who played important roles in the movie version. Yet, they all could very easily steal the show. I won't list them all, but don't forget you can check out the IMDb page to see where I'm coming from.

[SPOILERS AHEAD] Just like the game, you get to follow the clues and guess along with who is the murderer. Now, the movie has three different endings which the DVD version does have all of them. My favourite, of course, is the third one where everyone, except Mr. Green (Michael McKean), killed someone. Though, the best part about this is if you do carefully watch the movie, it all perfectly sits together.

[STILL SPOILERS] For instance, Wadsworth (Tim Curry) says that the person who killed Mr. Boddy (Lee Ving) was not present when they were in the kitchen. Three people were not present, and in each of the endings, one of them were the original murderer. It's probably sad that I have watched this movie so many times that I have been able to pick these all up, but the movie was so perfectly crafted that it could work out with so many possible endings, just like the game.

Nightmares and Night Breakfast

I went out for a night on the town, so I almost missed posting an entry. I still have not missed one day yet, however! Even if my entry was stupid because I was sick or brain dead. It's all good. So Coco, Stoves and I went to see A Nightmare on Elm Street and then endulged in some night breakfast at Denny's. (Which is tradition.)

The remake wasn't a total disaster, but I had my quibbles. Quite a few. Well, more than a few. More like alot. Don't get me wrong, the movie didn't fall completely flat, but it wasn't as good as the original despite new effects, a script with more time spent on it, etc.

One thing I have to give the movie credit for is that it admitted it's only a slasher film: let's get right down to the violence. No 20 minutes setting characters up when we all know they're going to be killed sooner or later anyway. [SPOILERS AHEAD] However, they spent the first half hour with Kris (Katie Cassidy) and then she is killed. Wait a minute, I thought she was the main character. I started scratching my head.

Okay, at first I was confused, but I give them credit for a different format. I was starting to get annoyed, though, but all the goofs. [SPOILERS AHEAD] The most noticable one being when Marcus (Aaron Yoo) is posting his blog about his nightmares. During the last one, he falls asleep and his head is smashed into the camera. Uh, excuse me, but who posted the blog then? Freddy?

Oh, speaking of Freddy (Jackie Earle Haley)... Worst part of the whole movie. I know Mr. Haley has a following. Mostly of geeks who were in love with Watchmen and probably had never heard of him until then. I'm sorry to disappoint you, but if I had never seen him in something else, I would highly doubt his acting chops. His Freddy was zombie-like. He barely had any emotion. He didn't even seem to enjoy killing when the REAL Freddy (Robert Englund) spit his one liners with the obvious enjoyment of the sadist he was.

Sure, the original was cheesy. The acting wasn't fantastic. The effects were as good as a low-budget movie made in the 80's could be. I stand by my original statement that the original didn't need to be remade. Englund will always be Freddy and he'll haunt my nightmares before new Freddy ever does.

Stuffy Noses and Movies

I've had a cold for about a week now. Aren't they annoying? Constantly sniffling. Coughing my lungs out. I just wish it would go away already, but it has finally cleared my cold medicine drugged mind and broken my writer's block of the day.

When I'm sick, like most people, I don't feel like doing anything. I usually end up watching CSI since Spike shows it 10 hours a day. Weekends, though, are an awful time to watch television. Spike resorts to wrestling which, I'm proud to say, I do not indulge in.

So, when I'm sick on the weekend, I snuggle into my blanket cocoon and sit down with a movie. Usually I choose a nice heartwarming film. Sometimes, if I'm not just physically ill but sick of being sick, I throw in a good old horror movie.

There was one paticular time when I had a stomach virus and I watch Sleepy Hollow for the first time. That wasn't exactly a good idea. Very bloody movie. Many trips to the bathroom to unload my stomach contents. For some reason, though, I remember that the first time I watched that movie when I was sick.

It is a bit odd, but sometimes movies seem better when you're not feeling good. Maybe it's because I'm like a lump on a log and have no choice but to pay strict attention. I don't know. I haven't really come up with a conclusion today because I still feel like death warmed over. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go watch a flick.

Lime Light

I was really excited to see the movie Lymelife after I read about it in EW about a year ago. I just finally got around to waching it (literally finished it ten minutes ago) and now I come bearing a movie review.

Granted, I am a fan of the realistic films that the inedpendent scene has been churning out the past ten or so years. However, Lymelife didn't quite make it, I think. The movie at times felt like it was either moving too fast or too slow, and it always changed speed at the wrong time. The most likeable character for me, Jim (Kieran Culkin) ends up leaving before you even truly get to know his character.

Thanks to my mom, I was quite aware of all the anachronisms right down to "No one wore red bras in the 70's... unless you were a hoochie!" See, you can learn so much about the past watching period pieces. I can understand that when you're setting a film in the past, it can be hard to keep everything accurate. [SPOILERS AHEAD] However, they have Jim going off to fight in the Falkhands War which (as stated in the list of anachronisms on IMDb) didn't occur until 1982 and didn't even invole American troops.

I think I could look past all that even, but the thing that got me most was the awkwardness between our two main characters Scott (Rory Culkin) and Becky (Emma Roberts). [SPOILERS AHEAD] The sex scene between the two near the end of the film goes on way too long. (See! The pace changes yet again!) It's extremely uncomfortable to watch. I mean, come on people. Everyone has had their own awkward first times. I don't think anyone really wants to watch someone else's. Even if it is fictional.

So the movie had some things going for it. As I said, Jim was a good character. And of course, Alec Baldwin turned a great performance, even if he was once again playing an alcoholic father who screws everything up. I guess he does that well. (See Running with Scissors.) Alot against it. I guess they all can't be fantastic. If you want to watch something that promises to make you laugh (and once again the blurbs lie) and instead makes you cry, then this is the movie for you.

They're Coming to Get You

I have already blogged about my love for all things zombie. As I had said in that entry, my first exposure to zombies was by watching George Romero's classic movie Night of the Living Dead. I am obviously a huge Romero fan, so of course, I was excited when I heard that he has a new movie coming ou this month.

First, let's take a quick look at Romero's filmography. After the success of Night, he continued the Dead series with Dawn of the Dead. (My personal favourite of the original trilogy.) There is a rumour that he wrote a sequel that he did not like, and he decided to sell that script and start over. The rumoured film: Return of the Living Dead. Then came Day of the Dead, which ended the Dead series. Or so we thought.

Now, the first three have all seen remakes now. Night has had two, one in 1990 which was alright and then another in 2006 that was in 3-D. Man, it was awful. Day's remake, starring Nick Cannon, barely stood up to the original and changed most of the plotline. The only remake I think that lived up to the orignal had to be the Dawn remake, which is a fantastic zombie movie in it's own right.

Romero wasn't finished however. In 2005, he released Land of the Dead. Technically not part of the Dead series, but widely accepted as the fourth film since it's set after the events of Day. I wasn't a big fan of Land, but it did see some success. The concept was very unique and interesting and out of all of the Dead films, probably the most scary.

I'm only on this, but I actually loved the next film, Diary of the Dead. Most fans claim that Romero was just hopping on the bandwagon with the success of Cloverfield. The whole movie is shot through Jason's (Josh Close) point of view. I don't know about you, but I love that style if it's done right and I think that Romero did a fantastic job. Even if it's ranked as his worst film.

So now on the 28th this month, we have Survival of the Dead coming out. The boards don't seem to offer any good news. Most people are saying "the trailer looks awful." "Romero will not be able to live down Diary now." I don't really care. When it comes to Romero, he is the king of zombie movies. I'm going to go see it, and even if it's like Land, I still know I will not leave the theater disappointed.

Don't Call Me Shirley

Spoof movies usually make fun of whole genres at one go. (Naked Gun makes fun of cop movies, Scary Movie makes fun of, obviously, scary movies, etc.) Somewhere along the line, they've become their own genre. They're usually released directly on DVD with no press. I bet you've never even heard of Stan Helsing. Yet, I've watched it two times myself.

I have a soft spot for spoof movies. I remember watching Airplane, Young Frankenstein and Blazing Saddles as a kid. I hadn't seen many of the movies that they were even making fun of. (I still haven't watched that many Westerns to this day.) But I loved them so much. They never fail to make me laugh.

Sure, the genre had taken a turn for the worst for a bit back there. We had monstrosities such as Date Movie. (God, that made me want to gauge my eyes out.) We had our fair share of near misses such as Not Another Teen Movie. (Which I think I only like because of the slow clap guy.) Oh, and probably the most ridiculous of them all: My Big Fat Independent Movie. (The biggest waste of five dollars ever.)

I don't think that the spoof movie will be dying any time soon, though. People love to laugh. It truly is the best medicine. We love the serious movies. We love the scary movies. We also love to then proceed to make fun of these movies. Yes, I'm a fan of riffing, so obviously I would be a supporter of the spoof genre. You know you love it too.

I think if anything, spoof movies actually help the movie industry. Not only are they making money off of their DVD rentals and sales, but the movies that are made fun of may possibly see spikes in their rentals and sales too. (It does help to know what they're making fun of.) So rent a funny movie. Maybe rent a few others if you aren't sure what the jokes mean. Then prepare to laugh.

It's Just a Jump to the Left

What exactly makes a film a cult classic? Probably one of the first movies that comes to mind when you hear the term is Rocky Horror Picture Show. It definitely has a cult following, but it doesn't really fit the typical definition of a cult classic.

To quote Urban Dictionary (Oh yes, a reliable source.) a cult classi is "a popular piece of work, generally a movie, which has gained a large following. This following has most likely been around for at least a few years..." RHPS would not fit this description since it's following was immediate. Cult classics usually don't do well initially. The definition continues though to say "...except for cases of an 'instant cult classic,' in which a movie gains instant fame which remains for decades to come."

I do believe that RHPS is probably the most well known cult classic, but it's success was when it was released. It did well in the theaters, and to me, that doesn't really scream "cult" classic. Cult following, yes, but a movie that's just classic, despite being a bit different than Gone with the Wind. (Which, by the way, did so well in theaters it was the biggest money maker for fifty years.)

To me, a cult classic would be something more like Donnie Darko. It was barely a blip on the rader when it was released in theaters. About a year later, however, teenagers across the country found themselves drawn to the movie. Many identified with young Donnie (Jake Gyllenhaal) and the movie became a huge hit. It has since made more money on DVD sales then it did in theaters, and it spawned a sequel ten years later entitled S. Darko.

I think that "cult classic" is a term that is going to die off soon. Most movies, even independently made ones, are shown at so many theaters, it's not hard to have minor success at the box office. Years ago, it was easy for a film to barely get any press while it was showing, but then become well known after it was released to video. Cult followings of movies will continue to thrive, but they will be bigger and you'll probably have actually heard of the movie.

Melon Farmer

Don't worry. I'll get around to explaining the title of this entry. First, I should mention that I'm a big fan of television as well as movies, if you hadn't guess that already. The average American watches at least three hours of television per day. I'm sure that I exceed the amount. Ten times over. No wait, there isn't thirty hours in a day.

It should go without saying, then, that I have watched my fair share of movies on television. Mostly the B grade horror and science fiction types on Sci Fi. I mean, how could you pass up Frankenfish? It's a classic.

The funny thing is, the censorship if my favourite part of watching movies on television. Granted, I think that censorship needs a bit of a make over. In this day and age, there are things that are cut out that shouldn't be and then things that are left in that really should be cut out. God forbid we see a little blood, but it's okay to basically show softcore porn.

I'm not concerning myself with that right now, however. It would take more than one blog post to rant about that. I'd much rather talk about the censorship of inappropriate language that can be so hilarious. The first time I ever saw Jeepers Creepers was on Sci Fi on summer's day. They say "bull shit" at least twenty times in that movie. Instead of the classic "bleeping" it out or the more modern technique of "silencing" it, they replaced it with "bull spit".

Bull spit is fine and dandy. It actually works. What happens when they can't come up with something that still makes sense but is appropriate for television. One day, I just left on Idle Hands playing on MTV while I was eating lunch. (Little side note: Never watch a horror movie on MTV. They literally cut out even paper cuts.) The original line in question was "I can't believe you cock blocked me like that." Oh, you definitely cannot say "cock". So what did they replace it with? "I can't believe you goat blocked me like that." I don't know if it's just me, but that sounds dirtier. I guess I must have a filthy mind.

Though, the creme of the crop has to be from Die Hard. One day, me and my dad were watching Die Hard on TNT, I believe it was. You know how much they cuss in that one. Every single "mother fucker" was replaced with (you guessed it) "melon farmer". Fantastic. I love it.

Even though censorship is a bit out dated, I still love watching movies to see how they'll edit them. It can be extremely entertaining. Oh, and to this day, I still call people melon farmer. They think I'm crazy. To that, I say bull spit. I'm totally sane. Now excuse me. I have a goat to meet for lunch.

Lock Up All Sharp Objects

Yeah, that's one of the catch phrases of FearNET, the onDemand station for horror movies. I watch it quite a bit. Free horror movies that arent' edited with no commercials? I was like "Sign me up."

I've managed to watch alot of bad and good movies thanks to FearNET. I sat through at least five Paris Hilton films that didn't involve her naked and usually resulted in death. I've seen interviews with cool bands such as Reel Big Fish talking about their favourite movie monsters.

One of the best movies I ever saw on FearNET was a little movie called Disturbing Behavior. Granted, when I say good, it doesn't mean it's fantastic. It has quirks going for it, but unfortunately not the best ending. Later, I found out, it could have been a better movie.

DB is your typical "high school kids are being brain washed" type of movie. Though, literally, they are being brain washed. And killing off those students who have some actual individuality and refuse to be preppy zombies. Perfect cheesy movie set up.

Unfortunately, the ending falls flat. I later found out, though, there was an alternative ending that actually had some spunk that fit in with the rest of the movie. [SPOILERS AHEAD] When U.V. (Chad Donella) shoots Gavin (Nick Stahl), Gavin says "I guess this diminishes my chances of ever meeting Trent Reznor..." as he dies. Yeah, I guess only us other unique kids who refuse to be mindless zombies would get a Nine Inch Nails joke.

All in all, it's a pretty decent movie. I eventually bought it on DVD so I can watch it with the better ending. Makes it a bit better, though the beginning is really the best part. I guess the writers got a little mindless at the end there themselves, but it's still worth a watch one day when you're bored. Home alone. All the lights are off. Oh, and look. A thunderstorm is on it's way.

Don't Panic

I just recently finished reading And Another Thing... by Eoin Colfer. The book is the sixth in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy trilogy, originally penned by Douglas Adams. Unfortunately, Mr. Adams is no longer with us, but left behind notes for a possible new book. Mr. Colfer took on the challenge and turned out a pretty good book.

Now, I know this is a movie blog. I'm getting there... I'm getting there. In 2005, right before Mr. Adams passed away, a movie version of the first book was released. I figured since I finished the book yesterday and my entry that day was books that were adapted into movies, it would be perfect to do a review of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.

Guide has been portrayed in so many mediums. It orignially started out as a radio program on the BBC. Then Adams started to write it as a book for the fans who couldn't listen to it each week. The book was the first to enjoy huge success. It was then turned into a play and eventually a TV show that covered the first two books of the series.

I was actually amazed that it wasn't until 2005 that a movie version was in the works, but I'm actually glad they waited. The TV had a wonderful charm with obvious and purposely cheesy effects. I love the show, but I'm glad that the movie has costumes that are a bit more believable and a Marvin (voice of Alan Rickman) that doesn't walk so stiffly.

At first, I was quite shocked at the casting decisions, Mos Def as Ford Prefect being the biggest one. Even though I love my Zooey Deschanel, too, I never really imagined Trillion as a brunette. (Though in And Another Thing..., Colfer describes Trillion as a brunette, probably due to this change in the movie.) However, I ended up loving the cast. Especially Sam Rockwell as Zaphod Beeblebrox. I think he did an absolutely fantastic job. He had his naivity, evil tendencies and ego-mania down perfectly. [SPOILERS AHEAD] Oh, and how they portrayed his second head was genius!

So, as I came to the conclusion yesterday, some movies can definitely do justice to the book. Sure, things were changed. [SPOILERS AHEAD] Hollywood needed a love story, so they had Arthur (Martin Freeman) and Trillion (Deschanel) get together at the end. If they had stuck around to do all the books, they would have had their love story once Fenchurch came along. (Besides, I think Deschanel would make a better Fenchurch than Trillion) But I can't fault them. They still turned out a great film.

Don't Judge a Movie by Its Cover

I've already discussed TV shows that are made into movies. Now I'm going to touch on literature that is adapted into film as well. Books have been used as inspiration for movies, obviously, longer than TV. Some of the most classic movies were based on novels. (Gone With the Wind, Wizard of Oz, Dracula, etc.)

Every movie that is based on a book has some controversy whether the original work or the film is better. I can't just give you one answer that applies to every movie. It truly depends on how well the script is written (Did they cut out anything crucial to the plot? Did they adjust the dialogue to sound more realistic when spoken?) and then the rest is left up to the director.

It is really hard to take a 500 page novel and condense it to fit an hour and a half. Some things are going to be changed: characters will be altered and side plots will be cut out.

It is possible to do right by a book. There are several movie version of novels I love that I enjoy. In fact, most of them I saw the movie first and it was so good that I was compelled to go out and read the novel.

The Princess Bride is the best example I can come up with. I grew up with that movie and always loved it. (I even owned the "As You Wish" shirt with Westley on it.) I probably watched that movie 100 times over by the time I picked up the novel. I believe the book is definitely better even though I had the whole movie memorized before I even thought of reading it. [SPOILERS AHEAD] There is this one element in the novel that could never be translated into film. The exact time period is never mentioned in the book nor film. In the book, however, subtle hints are dropped when the narrator says "This was after soup, but then again, everything was after soup." It's a small part of the novel that I just love.

I know I was a bit more cynical when it came to television shows I love being made into films. I think that it's a bit different considering that a TV show can run for several seasons and accumulate over hundred of hours of footage. With a novel, it's an easier task to accomplish and the characters don't already have faces the fans know and love.

I Can Smell Your Brains

Why do I love zombies? I don't think I can really answer that question. I usually like horror movies with serial killers as opposed to monsters because they're more realistic. Being a logical person, zombies are as far from real as you can get. Yet, I can never get enough.

I do know where my love for zombies spawned from. When I was eight, I watched the original Night of the Living Dead with my dad. [SPOILERS AHEAD] I was so shocked by the ending. At first I was devestated. I had really wanted Ben to survive. It took awhile, but I eventually realized it's the best ending of any horror film ever. It made me realize, they can't always make it out alive.

Since then, I have been hooked on zombie films. I am obviously a huge Romero fan despite his downfalls. (letting them remake NOTLD and the fourth installment, Land of the Dead) I absolutely adore the whole "zombedy" genre. (Shaun of the Dead, Fido, Night of the Living Dorks, etc.) I even read zombie literature like crazy. (World War Z, Breathers, Pride and Predjudice and Zombies, etc.)

Now, first we have to get something straight. Zombies are NOT cannibals. Sure, zombies started off as humans, but it is not a virus. Sure, in some cases it is depicted as spreading like a virus. But once the person dies and becomes a zombie, it is now a new species all together. Oh, and most zombies don't actually eat brains. The first (and for the longest time only) movie where zombies actually called "Brainssss..." was Return of the Living Dead.

Zombie movies can become very formulaic. Introduce main characters. Outbreak occurs. Characters try to survive. One or two make it out alive. Feds come in and start to kill zombies off. There can be some very unique zombie films that have great, fantastic twists. (Return of the Living Dead 3, Diary of the Dead, etc.) Much like a zombie who can never finish one meal before heading to the next, I don't think I'll ever get enough of zombie flicks.

Vampires Don't Sparkle

"The only time a vampire should sparkle is right before he bursts into flames." - My Dad

I almost died when my dad said that after I had intially described what Twilight was about. I have to completely agree. I'm not a huge fan of the vampire myths. I disliked every Anne Rice book I attempted to read. (I also disliked most of the movies as well with the exception of Interview with a Vampire.) I never went as a vampire for Halloween as a kid. I was always more a zombie kind of gal.

I have to say however that when it comes to my vampire myths, I'm perfer tradition over inovation. Dracula (Bela Lagosi) is still the biggest lady killer I know. Edward (Robert Pattinson) ain't got nothin' on him. So when a friend of mine told me to read Twilight (recommendation including a detailed account of pretty much the whole book), I was a little apprehensive going into it. I eventually gave up after five chapters.

You would think that due to this, I would not go to see the film. Unfortunately for me, I was dragged along with a group of friends who loved the book series. Sure, I never finished the whole book, so you can consider my opinion unimportant. Book or not, though, this was a horrible movie.

The acting was incrediably stilted, and it's not the actors. I have seen most of these actors in other films where I thought that they did fantastic jobs. (see Kristen Stewart in Adventureland and Jackson Rathebone in S. Darko) I blame the script. The dialogue between characters sounded forced. There were periods where I thought that my eight year old cousin could have written it better.

Granted, I don't usually go for romance movies. I do have a select few that I admit are brillantly done, though. (Ever After, Uptown Girls, etc.) The chemistry between Bella (Stewart) and Edward is non-existant. It seems that the only reason Bella really stays with Edward is because it feels rebelious. "Oh, your boyfriend is captain of the football team? Well, mine's immortal and sparkles like a pansy in the sunlight."

Oh, and let's not forget the obvious machoism associated with Edward. Bella can never seem to fight for herself. Edward has to protect her from the other vampires when they interrupt the baseball game. Then he comes to rescue when James (Cam Gigandet) kidnaps her.

I'm sorry, but I think that Twilight is teaching young girls that it's okay to set ourselves back fifty years. Without Edward, Bella is an emotionless, worthless person. Yet when Edward is around she's HIS emotionless, worthless trophy girlfriend. There are so many better movies (and books) out there for young girls (and their crazy moms) to read with better role models. I just wish that for once something worthwhile could become the next trend.

Soundtrack Available

Most of our favourite movies wouldn't be quite the same without their soundtrack. Music sets the mood, gives us a time period and fills what would otherwise be awkward silence. Granted, alot of my favourite movies do have some awkward silence during scenes, but you have to keep in mind that I like the quirky indie films that don't follow rules.

I'll be honest, I don't own alot of the soundtracks to my favourite movies. Many of the ones I love I already owned a decent amount of the music that was used. For instance, The Go-Getter's soundtrack consists of mostly M. Ward and The Replacements. I already own all of their albums.

So The Go-Getter cheated. I already was in love with that music. The same can be said then for movies like Juno (The Moldy Peaches, Kimay Dawson, etc.), Wristcutters (Gogol Bordello) and Adventureland (more The Replacements, Velvet Underground, etc.). It was too easy for them to win me over with their brillant choice of tunes.

Excluded these movies then, what is my favourite movie soundtrack? It is a very tough decision to make. I decided, however, that the answer is an easy one when I think about it. Empire Records is one of my favourite soundtracks, and if it weren't for that movie, I would not have known many of those bands.

The movie was made in 1995 when I was just a wee child. I didn't see the movie until I was about 13 years old. I immediately fell in love. The movie is completely over the top with characters that you can easily assign to your friends.

The music is a mix of 90's indie rock (Toad the Wet Sproket), punk (The Adolescents), 80's pop (Billy Idol) and original music for the movie (Coyote Shivers and, of course, Rex Manning). I find myself singing along with the tunes just like the employees of Empire every time I watch the movie. Every song that was chosen fits perfectly and definitely fits the vibe of an independent record store.

Murder for Dummies

I started writing today's entry hours ago, decided I didn't like what I was writing, watched Fanboy and Chum Chum and crashed on my couch. I have returned, though, bearing another movie review.

As you have learned from previous posts, me and my friend Coco love sharing movies with each whether we rent them together or discover them indepently. A couple of months ago, she recommended this film to me. I had already bookmarked it myself, and after she had said it was a good film, I decided to give it a go.

This movie would be How to Be a Serial Killer. It's a little horror comedy film that has caused alot of controversy amongst independent film makers. Most say that it's copying better films such as Mr. Brooks and Behind the Mask. I hate to say that I have seen neither of these films. You know I probably will eventually, and perhaps then my assessment will be less biased.

Rip off or not, I did enjoy this movie despite it's few downfalls. [SPOILERS AHEAD] The whole concept of Mike (Dameon Clarke) teaching the "audience" the ways of serial killing a la a magician meets a seminar is absolutely hilarious. The rules he comes up with are so out there, yet make sense. For instance, never kill people you know. It'll just get messy from there on.

[STILL MORE SPOILERS] Which of course, becomes Mike's downfall. Luckily for him, his protege Bart (Matthew Gray Gubler) has been taking notes. I mean, literally, he carries a notebook with them when they go killing people. The Gube is just so good at playing the nerds. He is a good student, and even though they are technically the bad guys, the viewer is happy to see Bart following in Mike's footsteps by the end of the film.

I won't lie. I'm a sucker for the anti-hero so of course I was going to like the whole concept of the serial killers being the characters you feel for. It is true that the best part of the film is Mike's lecture and sometimes the whole mocumentary style does not fit, but it's worth a good laugh.